You, who are you? what do you want? The Highlights of my week? why not:
I started building a time-machine, but then my future self back in time to tell me to stop waisting my time.
The apes returned from the back of the oval, with flame throwers and switch-blades. Switch blades to take on semi-circles of people, like in the movies.
Tan exploded
I lit a chicken on fire to prove a point
I got new cymbals for drum kit, ZHT zilidjians
I ended slavery
I told some guy that the next time he waltz with Matilda he should check her Adam's apple, CAUSE SHE'S A DUDE!
I watched Wayne's world... a-fuckin-gain
"Benjamin is nobody's friend. If Benjamin were an ice-cream flavour, he'd be prailings... and dick."
I threw potatoes into the MCG
I watched helplessly as Marty punched someone with down syndrome
Ah the rage is relentless
I re-enacted the civil war with monkeys
"...... until the handle breaks off and you have to find a doctor to pull it back out again."
I caught the ape in a butterfly net and released on Jim while he was sleeping
I trained a gorilla to whack off on Marty
I fly kicked a monkey
I threw a keg at Omar
I grew a tree in Jim's parent's room, then blamed it on Jim
I put a billboard outside of Michael's house to block out the sun.
I had my thumb bit off by a hobo
An old lady fell over and hit her head on a bin on the way down.
I turned a bus full of nuns
Song of the week // Blues From Down Here // Tv on the Radio// Return to Cookie Mountain
Sup dudes, I am posting yet again, yeah you thought I was joking when I said I was back well I wasn't, so there. Well time to get to it. Max's party was last Friday, it was probally the best party I've ever been to. If you weren't there here's what you missed out on:
Me getting toasted
Heaps of other people getting toasted.
Germany invading
St Patrick's day count down
Me throwing a jacket at a light
Me becoming the king
Someone breaking the light in the hallway
A FIRE IN THE LOBBY
I got the corn flakes
Me bagging Moses
Me bagging pretty much every religion; including aestheticism.
I threw the corn flakes into mount doom
Did I mention I was toasted?
We PLAYED SINGSTAR
I was shouting for max, and when I couldn't find him I laid down in the hallway, and didn't let anyone pass.
Lots of pink elephants
Me coming out of the closet as being a straight man, I admit it, I'm straight.
I gave heaps of people hugs
I fell over, 6 times
I took off my shirt and rolled on it
I threw a pram at some kid
I did a back flip off the padeo
I kept telling everyone to come to the padeo, but they wouldn't listen
I BROKE MAX'S GUITAR!
I started dancing in the middle of some circle
I fly kicked someone in the nads
Michael was trying to have his way with Max's sister
Jim and I kicked down max's door when he was in there making out
I threw a chair on Max's bed
Michael almost got hit by a train on the way home
He held his ears in rage as the train went by beeping its horn
Thats about all I can remember from that
Song of the Week// Wolf Like Me// Tv on the Radio // Return to Cookie Mountain. Fucking awesome band, if you havent heard of them, now you have.
Yes that's right, I'm back... I'm pretty damn sick of myspace, It was all right at first. It just got annoying having everyone having one. I mean I can understand if you're a band and you want people to hear you're music, or if your a celebrity and people actually care what you have to say, then its pretty cool. I dunno, maybe I'm just delusional, but I think blogs are much more fun. Well heres a list of ways Ive out smarted the government
I put a cardboard cut-out of George Bush on the roof of the white house then lit it on fire.
I told activists that the white house has a wine cellar filled with dead bodies
I covered my hand with mayonnaise and shook the queens hand as she went by in her limo, sure, I was shot six times, but it was worth it.
I brain-washed an ape into hating the government, then unleashed it on John Howard as he went out for his morning power walk.
I poured piping hot gravy on the republicans as the they entered the house of representatives.
I ate the presidents apple.
I replaced the prime ministers speech with a bunch of epilepsy jokes.
I wrote George Bush an evaluation on the war in Iraq
I fried an egg on John Howard's head
I put out a cigarettes on George Bush's dog's eye
I told the president it was possible to smoke through your butthole, and they find it very flattering in most Asian countries
I glued head phones on George Bush and forced him to listen to the corn
I injected Prince Charles with the T-Virus
I did donuts on capital hill (If you don't know what what capital hill is your a communist)
I glued the presidents hand to a potatoe
I jumped out of the photo copier and suprised the prime minister
I buried George Bush up to his head in my front lawn, then mowed it
I fired a cannon into the presidents chest as he opened the door.
I wrote this list
Song of the Day//Feel Good Hit of the Summer// Queens of the Stone Age //Restricted
You, who are you? what do you want? The Highlights of my week? why not:
