Beef a genius or a lucky idiot

Hey YOU! yeah thats right (you've got some nerve mister) its time for me to tell you whats been happening in my week:

• Taco bill concealed a taco into a burrito factory and was shot 32 times in the spleen
• A fat man went streaking trough our school
• I wrote a song called "watch your step" (its about the war in iraq)
• We intercepted a transmission between some apes. (they're concocting some sweet bruttal revenge)
• I ate some chicken salt
• I got angry
• I was body slammed by luka
• Piggy wars: massive pile ups with me on the top
• Getting stacked on by 4 people (one of which was jacob)
• Almost throwing up because i had my ribs imploded
• I took 4 shots of rum then picked a fight with a scottish guy
• I was gang tackled by rugby players
• I started making a drumbeat in my mind
• I got a life
• I went to spain
• I blew up spain
• I was forced to rebuild spain
• I became an infadel
• I swam to new zealand with nothing but a hunting knife in my mouth
• I cut my lip, then i downed
• I beat cancer
• I fell out of a tree
• I was called a nerd
• I jumped off the 500 block after smoking some tabookie thunder
• I tore ross a new corn shoot
• I blew up the eiffel tower, again
• I had a drinking contest with an ape
• The ape won
• I played nintendo against the ape
• The ape won
• I had a staring contest against the ape
• the ape punched me in the face
• I relised what its like to be the washington sniper
• We watched CSI in science
• We watched bowling for collumbine in english
• We watched bouling for the maid in german (i dont do german)
• I snorted some wasabi
• I threw up some wasabi over the eastern free way
• I didnt go to julia's party (was it good?)
• I ate pretzels
• My friend Kyle is coming down from queensland in december and i want all my friends to meet him
• I deflated a giant monkey out-side some car dealing place (I was all like "now whos giant?")
• I bought an anti aircraft gun to put on my roof
• I shot down 4 planes
• I hearled on a beaver
• I ejaculated on a fried chicken
• I made a burrito launcer
• I unleashed the burrito launcher in the school car park
• I was born in switzerland
• Laura picked up jacob and threw him into the obiss
• I read the dictionary
• Omphaloskepsis: the practice of contemplating one's navel, esp. as carried out by eastern mystics as an aid to inducing a trance-like state.
• hehehe the navel is the belly button
• Tess wet my pants (I dont why this is a highlight)
• My sister ran into a door
• I have plans to make a national green day (a green day is when you just sit at home and smoke pot)
• Michael punched my arm and I accidentally hit barry in the head
• Jimmy looked like he was gonna break
• I protest about Futurama getting cancelled by lighting myself on fire
• I shoot corn out of my nose, AMAZING i know
• I rubbed my smelly toe on Marty
• I rubbed my smelly toe on stu
• Marty and Stu both got ape fever
• No I dont have a hemmoroid, thanks for asking
• I watched a funny movie with Jackie Chan
• I ran into a train head on (thank god it wasn't moving)
• I went with some of my family to see a scenic railroad then had a picnic
• I lost some dice in my nose
• The apes attacked our school with the "poop launcher", also known as the "shit blaster"
• I got blisters on my ass from going down a slide NAKED
• I covered my self in tar then rolled in feathers, I then walked in front of some nimrods saying "hey you, yeah you. How about you hunt something your own size"
• I had 14 bullets removed from my ass (theres still 8 in there, shhhhh)
• for those of you that dont now what a nimrod is, well its a hunter
• I dyed my hair chrome
• I went black to the future
• Sunday Garbage
• You know how people say they have guns under their pillows. Well I have a nuclear warhead, thats right if some breaks into my house I'll just take out the hammer and go "I'll do it I'll do it. Im crazy brbrbrbrbrb"
• I locked my self to a chair, sticky taped my eyes open and put the TV on "TCM" (I still fell asleep)
• Dookie-beep-beep-wooie on my dolphin wigs. Porky-plop-plop-suey now i'm eating twigs >_<
• I watched retarded animal babies
• Mariana and I adopted children (mine is called Charlie)
• I got a flaming skull tattooo..... It washed off
• I dyed my armpit hair red
• I looked back on the past week
• I wrote about the past week
• I finished writing about the past week

This has been Beefus Production