The Cheese Is Big, Really Big

35 reasons why the government is after me.

1. I found out what they really put in post stamp glue (Toad Mucus)
2. I found out about the government Conspiracy
3. I destroyed the dinosaurs
4. I found out that bill clinton's real name is Ashleigh
5. I took the white house hostage with only a hunting knife and some dental floss
6. I turned water into ....... DEATH!
7. I found out that George Bush has hemoroids (the hard way)
8. I Mooned the federal government
9. I kept ringing george bush and asking for 'tony' and 'steve'
10. I found out that they put sublimital messages in their adds
11. I found out what chocolate is made out of
12. I had a massive party and didn't invite them
13. I found out a disturbing secret about tic-tacs
14. I orderd 1500 magehrita pizzas to the white house and then the president said "what happened to the rest of this pizza. Its just cheese brbrbrbrrb"
15. I learnt how to fart the alphabet
16. I made a pair of stillts big enough to get on top of the white house
17. I stole the presidents chopper
18. I unleashed an angry baboon into the white house
19. I found out what they're really putting in our drinking water
20. I unleashed several more baboons into the white house
21. I picked up the president's dog and kicked off a roof
22. I found out where tooth paste comes from
23. I put tooth paste on the pridents hand, then tickled him in the face with a feather while he was sleeping
24. I discovered a breed of super soldiers in the basement of the white house
25. I ate the prisedental cheese
26. I called george bush senoir's wife 'babbs'
27. I found out that powdered milk is actually cheese gratings
28. I made my own dooms day device
29. I sat on the prisedents muffin
30. I have an imcriminating photo of george bush jr picking his nose
31. I rang up asking for Hitler
32. I discoverd a deadly secret behind Mcdonalds
33. I launched a bottle where the sun don't shine on george bush
34. I unvealed that george bush is transfering funds to have me 'whacked'
35. I know too much

Okay, I thinks its about time we took back Sunday

I resently discovered that not everyone could comment on my blog so i put an end to that and now everybody can comment/insult HAZAR!...... Oh yeah aparently Julia's having a party this weekend im not really sure what for but, aparently im invited (so it has to be cool). "I'm gonna get so wasted" as Ross once said in an awesome voice. I was born in switzerland. All I need now is one of those pink tuxedos and I'll be all set........ If you want to fight you can take it up with the man. Oh man I need somebody else to wear a tuxedo too so I don't feel weird. Peace out ya'll.

• song of the day// look what happened// less than jake

• Beef's Quote of the day "Did i tell you shouldn't shutup, because if i did i was lying."

Sweet Lemonade

Untill His Anger grew so much that he couldn't control it.............

• Today was awsome, we had 3 periods of sport, and in martial arts we actually got to do stuff..w00t.... not much else happened. except for when ms johnson said to mick and callum they would be suspended if they kept saying the F-word.. Well lovers, keep loving and jerks, keep jerking. Peace Out!>beef

FIRE!!

I am writting this from school........ Erich has a blog its here i advise You check it out.... Also i sent shaun a "Virus" or atleast i made him believe i sent a virus. His reaction was priceless. Shaun you're a dope...... Peace Out.....

Come waste your millions here........

oh Man, I have my last foot ball game for the year today, I hope we win because losing sucks.. Last night I saw Sin City, it was pretty good, a little bit sadistic, but still pretty good.. My favourite part in the movie was when Bruce Willis ripped some guys nads off. I reckomend people who haven't seen it to go see it. Also when we were leaving we saw Todd he was going to see some movie, I don't think he was with anyone though. I also saw Zahn and stuff there after, that spaced me out man...well I'm going to break a water mellon SEE YAZ........

• >BEEF

Chicken s0up for the loser.........................

Bloody Callum hit me in the head with a shoe yesterday............

Thats My Radio Dial...........

Man my head hurts from writing in bright colours. ahhhh the relief. As you probally dont know or you do know..... bitch... Micks having his birthday party, well i wouldnt really call it a party i would probally call it a gathering. So Mick, Andy, Callum, Matt, DD, Omar (i think..), chris, possibly JIM, Mick (you never know, he might not show) and I. If left anyone out I hate you...Just kidding (I'm actually dead serious) We're going to see Sin City at forest Hill its suposed to be filled with Gore (not Forest hill the movie.... pay attention) and it has some good actors in it i'm not really sure who they are but i've heard they're good..... Oh yeah did i mention that Sin City is suposed to set in black and white, I love black and white movies. well I'll tell you how good it is tommoro..Laterz

• SONG of the day Showbiz// Muse// Showbiz. A Fucken awsome album

I've come from sanity to insanity. Whats next?

Sorry i haven't written in a while. I KNOW I SHOULD HAVE CALLED but ive been a bit busy...... A couple of weeks ago I got my sim card working for my mobile and the other day I asked tess Do you have jimmy's mobile number she said "yeah its 0424563005" and i was all like "cheers" so i message the phone and about ten minutes later i get a phone call saying who is this (in a womans voice) i was all like "it's Brendan" (because what good is having a regular name if you never use it. Plus i always refer to myself as Brendan) she was all like "i dont know you" and then i said "as do i" So i message tess saying i shall have to murder you.. Because i thought she was getting me back for the tony incidence. I get a message saying "woah thats just the number jim gave. Dont murder me."

• who wants to fight

• Song of the day // welcome to the new south // LESS THAN JAKE......

If you want to hear go to apefever or go to my site beefspants. its all good@!

Who wants some..............

Aparently i'm really good at pulling faces. So heres a picture from my archives.......

• .....And another......

• SoNg oF tHe dAy//Pardon Me// Incubus// Make yourself

Save the endangered egyptian worm.........

Sorry i haven't written in a while but I was busy, I think......... Well on saturday I went to see Richmond versus Essendon. Richmond won ofcourse. The day after (sunday) I played football it was annoying because the umpires gave three of our players yellow cards (i think they had too much ape juice). School....... The first day of the school semester(2 days ago), a day to start over with your school reports. unfortunatly i was still hungover from the holidays and sleep in until 8:00 i arrive at school i forget about my books and just run in to the class room the teacher turns around to see me sitting at the back of the class room. I give her the big cheesy wink and she continues writting on the board....... Today was no exeption i leave my house at 8:50 (the time that school starts) I arrive 20 minutes late. And of course i had to sign in at the office, Just so babbs knows im at school (babbs is the princible, you know, the big cheese). In SOSE today i forgot to bring this stupid fish thing that we had been working on in the last class, aparently i left it in my locker was an invalid answer and she commanded that i get it and when return i DIE! will actually she just put me in the corner (with all the spiders)..... Did i mention that I HATE BBQ SAUCE because i do. I think that pretty much sums everything up, Oh yeah bloody Alan came to our school and me dav jacob and stuff ambushed him with a sack of rusty door knobs......

• SONG OF THE DAY//Testify// rage against the machine// battle of los angeles

Free the muffins

If you want to see some thing cool click here. You'll feel the insanity... Last night I was so tired that I went to bed at 8:30 then i woke up at about 7:30 i managed to get 11 hours SLEEp. w00t. What else did i do...... oh yeah I Destroyed that fukin system once and for all! But for how long........... Do you have baby rash? alot of people have baby rash and are just too proud to admit it, for those of that don't know what baby rash is it's a rash you get from having a baby......

A Puzzle in my cereal

JIM is a cereal killer. Have you ever noticed that cereal is so poor it has to live in a box. News news hmmmmmm. Oh yeah I had the weirdest dream where our year level at school had to collect phone books. It was really weird, I think it was tess and shaun they were pushing theirs with one of those little cars that 3 year olds drive.. Weird huh :) enjoy the insanity >beef

Act 2...........

So anyway the guy hits me over the head with a log and i'm all like hey buddy you got a change for a five dollar bill.. True story

• SOME AUDIO CLIPS YOU MUST HEAR
• ren & stimpy
• beavis & butthead
• beavis & butthead
• Austin powers

If You wanna see something cool go to billywest.com did you know that he did the voice of doug & bugs bunny

Focus............

Hey, thats me....... I think? DAMN!! I forgot what i was going to write............................. I'll be back

Thats not your mother, its a man baby

Grrrrrrreetings Today I changed my audio clip for my profile. It was fucking annoying because the stupid blog people the site cant be 68 letters or more. IDIOTS! Anyway yesterday the funniest thing happened to me, Matt's grandpa was driving me home, i think he's forgotton me or something because he drove me to andrew's house. Luckily Andrew's mum was home and she gave me a lift home.So any way enjoy my audio clip and heres some others. beavis and butthead , ren & stimpy tom green (if it doesnt work delete the words http://www.blogger.com/)

Memo to self: shut up Mark

Do I really need to say anything? :) (:

So we meet again.....................

Man its been a whole 2 days sence my last post. on friday i went to see batman at the movies. It was pretty good a few plot holes but still pretty good. Oh yeah yesterday I went to the football to see Richmond drag their sorry arses over by a point (richmond 85 sydney 84). I think that was pretty much everything besides the massive crime spree i had, but you don't want to hear about that... song of the day//Jesus or a gun//Fuel// sun burn